Bullied child: Smallest voice should sound the loudest

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Updated: March 11, 2012 8:51AM

I wasn’t there, but reporter Erika Wurst painted a compelling picture of what went on earlier this week at the East Aurora School Board meeting. And I have to tell you, it wasn’t pretty.

You had one family so desperate to find relief from the bullying their seventh-grade special education student is enduring this year that an impassioned aunt pleaded her case at a public meeting.

Standing beside her was the child himself — a small, timid kid with disabilities who tearfully told a room filled with somber adults that he admitted to his doctor the bullying was so bad he wanted to kill himself.

And then there was the school principal, refusing even to make eye contact with the child or family.

Bullying isn’t a pleasant topic under any circumstances. But this story, just about everyone agrees, is particularly heart-breaking.

Over the years we’ve received lots of complaints from parents — every school district in our readership area — who are upset their children are being harassed in school. Sometimes we write about it. Often we don’t because in the end, a parent doesn’t want to put his or her name on the story for fear of a backlash toward the child.

So you have to give props to Jose’s family for going public. “We felt we had no other choice,” said Sylvia Carillo, the boy’s aunt.

Jose’s mother says she’s been trying to get the bullying to stop since last October, when her son’s shorts and boxers were pulled down during gym class. The family’s beef is that the school has done little to resolve this chronic problem, even accusing officials of tampering with statements. In another odd twist, the gym teacher who tried to stand up for Jose received a five-day suspension for insubordination.

The superintendent’s office says the bullying matter was handled in an appropriate and timely manner: Case closed. The school board points to its $50,000 anti-bullying program as evidence this issue is taken seriously in the district. And both school board President Annette Johnson and Simmons teacher Isabel De Los Santos assured me later they are seeing positive results since the program was initiated in the fall.

Bullying is not a problem just at East, with schools everywhere trying hard to address this difficult issue. But it’s not going away, no matter how much time and money is thrown at it, if adults let personal agendas — such as politics, personalities and image — get in the way of the well-being of young victims.

That’s why kudos should go to Marin Gonzales, East Aurora’s superintendent of secondary education, who rushed out of the meeting to console and applaud Jose and his family, promising to put a plan in place to help the boy.

That’s in stark contrast to Simmons Principal Mechelle Patterson, who, according to witnesses, left the meeting when the family began to speak; and refused to acknowledge their presence.

I don’t know what was going on in Patterson’s head during all this, of course, and she did not return my phone call asking for an explanation. De Los Santos insists the principal does an excellent job there, and this whole thing got blown out of proportion because the gym teacher stirred the pot inappropriately.

Nevertheless, board President Johnson assured me the district is “giving this matter a lot of attention.” Indeed, the principal on Thursday met with the family, who said Jose was offered the choice of changing schools or staying at Simmons with a new schedule and adult supervision.

They chose the latter, Jose’s mother, told me. And I hope all those involved will be able to put the pain and embarrassment of this unfortunate situation far behind them.

We’re talking about a child here — it should always be about the child.